Making a baby

Have a good laugh!!!!!!!

Making a baby. This is hilarious!

There is not one dirty word in it, and yet it is funny!--


Harry and Sally, were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family.










On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Harry kissed Sally good-bye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Sally cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well that's what Harry and I had hoped Please come in and have a seat !.

After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Sally.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time.. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know,' said Sally quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my God!' Sally exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

'She was difficult?' asked Sally.

'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around to get a good look'.

'A good look?' said sally, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached, I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

Sally leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'Sally fainted!

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Hide your EMAILS

If you want your manager not to see your personal mails

there is only one way to hide your emails :)

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Old Lady

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so

he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.

'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked. 'No, I don't,' she

replied.

'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex

and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let

them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right

size.'

She didn't crack a smile.

'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.

But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she

burst out laughing.

'What's so funny?' he asked

'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'

Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working!a

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