SIDE EFFECTS OF WORKING IN AN IT SECTOR

These are real life shared by IT people.
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Bhavik
 I once left home to go to the market wearing my ID cardand did not realize till my friend asked me why I was wearing it !!!!

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Bhabani
 Once I was flashing my ID card instead of unlocking the house door with keys.

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Ashok
 Few days back ? I slept at 12:00 in the night and woke up in the morningat 7:00 and suddenly thought that I haven't completed 8 hours andlaughed at myself when I realized that I am at home.

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Jyotsna
 Just after our training completion in Mysore and posting to Pune,me and my friends went out for dinner in one of the best restaurants. .And as I finished.. I started walking towards the wash basin with Plates in my hand.

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Kiran
 Once I was on call with my father and mom was not around.I went on to ask, "Why is she not attending the status call?"
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Bipul
 I don't login to orkut, yahoo, gmail, youtube, etc..at my personal internet connection at home...thinking it will be blocked any way.Till I realize - I am at home.

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Rohit
 Yeah sometimes it do happens with me also.keeping hands in front of tap for waitingwater to drop by itself is very frequent with me.I just forget that we have to turn on and off the tap....

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Nidhi
 Once after talking to one of my friendsI ended the conversation saying," Ok bye...in case of any issues will call u back"

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Nisha
 Sometimes when I mistakenly delete a message from my mobile, I hope for a second, maybe it’s in the recycle bin

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Nisha
 I gave my office mail id and password to access Gmail andwondered when they became invalid???

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Sandeep
 Once I went to a pharmacy n asked for a tab....pharmacist asked whether I want 250mg or 500mg.....I replied 256mb....thank god he didn't notice

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Ashwin
 Me getting a thought of doing an Alt+Tab while switchingfrom a news channel to the DVD while watching TV.

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Vidyarthi
 And I - after a forty hour marathon in Bhubaneshwar with Powerbuilder,decided to take a break and went to a movie. In the middle of the movie,when I wanted to check the time,I kept repeatedly glancing at the bottom right corner of the theatre screen!?

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Fishing Mirror

A fisherman from the city was out fishing on a lake in a small boat. He noticed another man in a small boat open his tackle box and take out a mirror. Being curious, the man rowed over and asked, "What is the mirror for?"

"That's my secret way to catch fish," said the other man. "Shine the mirror on the top of the water. The fish notice the spot of sun on the water above and they swim to the surface. Then I just reach down and net them and pull them into the boat."

"Wow! Does that really work?"

"You bet it does."

"Would you be interested in selling that mirror? I'll give you $30 for it."

"Well, okay."

After the money was transferred, the city fisherman asked, "By the way, how many fish have you caught this week?"

"You're the sixth," he said.

 

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Making a baby

Have a good laugh!!!!!!!

Making a baby. This is hilarious!

There is not one dirty word in it, and yet it is funny!--


Harry and Sally, were unable to conceive children and decided to use a surrogate father to start their family.










On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Harry kissed Sally good-bye and said, 'Well, I'm off now. The man should be here soon.'

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. 'Good morning, Ma'am', he said, 'I've come to...'

'Oh, no need to explain,' Sally cut in, embarrassed, 'I've been expecting you.'

'Have you really?' said the photographer. 'Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my specialty?'

'Well that's what Harry and I had hoped Please come in and have a seat !.

After a moment she asked, blushing, 'Well, where do we start?'

'Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living room floor is fun. You can really spread out there.'

'Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for Harry and me!'

'Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results.'

'My, that's a lot!', gasped Sally.

'Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time.. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with that.'

'Don't I know,' said Sally quietly.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. 'This was done on the top of a bus,' he said.

'Oh, my God!' Sally exclaimed, grasping at her throat.

'And these twins turned out exceptionally well - when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with.'

'She was difficult?' asked Sally.

'Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get the job done right. People were crowding around to get a good look'.

'A good look?' said sally, her eyes wide with amazement.

'Yes', the photographer replied. 'And for more than three hours, too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling - I could hardly concentrate, and when darkness approached, I had to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it all in.'

Sally leaned forward. 'Do you mean they actually chewed on your, uh...equipment?'

'It's true, Ma'am, yes.. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my tripod and we can get to work right away.'

'Tripod?'

'Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big to be held in the hand very long.'Sally fainted!

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Old Lady

A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so

he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves.

'Do you know how they make these gloves?' he asked. 'No, I don't,' she

replied.

'Well,' he spoofed, 'there's a building in Canada with a big tank of latex

and workers of all hand sizes walk up to the tank, dip in their hands, let

them dry, then peel off the gloves and throw them into boxes of the right

size.'

She didn't crack a smile.

'Oh, well. I tried,' he thought.

But five minutes later, during a delicate portion of the procedure, she

burst out laughing.

'What's so funny?' he asked

'I was just envisioning how condoms are made!'

Gotta watch those little old ladies! Their minds are always working!a

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The Washerman and Donkey

Have you heard the story of "The Washer man and the Foolish Donkey"?

To refresh your memory, and for the benefit of those who have not grown up listening to this moral story, it goes like this…

There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog. One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was fast asleep but the donkey and the dog were awake. The dog decided not to bark since the master did not take good care of him and wanted to teach him a lesson. The donkey got worried and said to the dog that if he doesn't bark, the donkey will have to do something himself. The dog did not change his mind and the donkey started braying loudly. Hearing the donkey bray, the thief ran away, the master woke up and started beating the donkey for braying in the middle of the night for no reason.

Moral of the story "One must not engage in duties other than his own"

Now take a new look at the same story…

The washer man (J) was a well educated man from a premier management institute. He had the fund as of looking at the bigger picture and thinking out of the box. He was convinced that there must be some reason for the donkey to bray in the night. He walked outside a little and did some fact finding, applied a bottom up approach, figured out from the ground realities that there was a thief who broke in and the donkey only wanted to alert him about it. Looking at the donkey's extra initiative and going beyond the call of the duty, he rewarded him with lot of hay and other perks and became his favorite pet. The dog's life didn't change much, except that now the donkey was more motivated in doing the dogs duties as well. In the annual appraisal the dog managed a "meets requirement". Soon the dog realized that the donkey is taking care of his duties and he can enjoy his life sleeping and lazing around. The donkey was rated as "star performer". The donkey had to live up to his already high performance standards. Soon he was over burdened with work and always under pressure and now is looking for a job rotation…

Disclaimer:
All characters in the story are not at all imaginary. Any resemblance to any person living or dying of work is purely intentional ;)

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