Q1. RAM SITA HAI ... TO RAM KAUN HAI ??Ans - . TAILOR ( darzi )Q2. SITA RAM HAI TO SITA KAUN HAIAns - . Sita MEMORY hai (RAM: Random Access Memory) Q3. Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi... Kumble brings a bottle of pepsibut goes directly to Tendulkar.? why ?? why ?? :-)Ans:- Tendulkar is an opener Q4. The Madrasi said, I want to see the movie 'heart is umbrella'. Whichmovie did he really want to see?Ans:- Dil Chhata Hai!...
URLs that went horribly wrong
check this outALL REALwww.NYCAnal.com --------------------------New York Canalwww.GotAHoe.com --------------------------Go Tahoewww.SpeedoFart.com ---------------------- Speed of Artwww.TheRapistFinder.com ------------------Therapist finderwww.Tranny.org ------------------------------Transfiguration Catholic Churchwww.WhorePresents.com ------------------- Who Representswww.BiGalsOnline.com ----------------------- Big Al's Onlinewww.PenisLand.net...
Who said car-names don't have meaning ?
BMW: Brings Me Women. FIAT: Failure in Italian Automotive Technology. FORD: For Only Rough Drivers. HYUNDAI: Hope You Understand Nothing's Drivable And Inexpensive. ... VOLVO: Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object. PORSCHE: Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything. KIA: Kills In AccidentsOPEL: Old People Enjoying LifeTOYOTA:...
Errors in Classifieds
These four classified ads appeared in a newspaper on four consecutive days. The last three hopelessly trying to correct the first day's mistake...******MONDAY: For sale - Vishanth has a sewing machine for sale. Phone 98407 16581 after 7PM and ask for Mrs Mani who lives with him cheap.******TUESDAY: Notice: We regret having erred in Vishanth's ad yesterday. It should have read, "One sewing machine for sale cheap. Phone 98407 16581...
The Washerman and Donkey
Have you heard the story of "The Washer man and the Foolish Donkey"?To refresh your memory, and for the benefit of those who have not grown up listening to this moral story, it goes like this…There was once a washer man who had a donkey and a dog. One night when the whole world was sleeping, a thief broke into the house, the washer man was...
CONVERSATION IN AN AIRPLANE
A stranger was seated next to a little girl on the airplane when the stranger turned to her and said : 'Let's talk. I've heard that flights go quicker if you strike up a conversation with your fellow passenger.'The little girl, who had just opened her book, closed it slowly and said to the stranger: 'What would you like to talk about?''Oh, I don't know,' said the stranger. 'How about nuclear power?'...
Goat and the Loin
One day a goat with her small child went into forest for food. UnfortunatelyThey lost their way while returning back to home and were stuck up in the forest at the night.Suddenly a Big lion came out of the woods and saw the goat and her child and quickly approached them. The frightened goat took her child nearer to her and started praying the gods thinking that lion will definitely eat both of them. Lion came nearer to them but...
How to hold on while the train is in motion
How to hold on while the train is in motion in order to avoid falling.I am referring to the older gentleman by the door!!! But you knew th...
A Car Accident and A Bottle Of Wine
A woman and a man are involved in a car accident on a snowy, cold Monday morning; it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally demolished, but amazingly neither of them are hurt. God works in mysterious ways.After they crawl out of their cars, the man is yelling about women drivers. The woman says, 'So, you're a man. That's interesting....
Teacher and Johnny
The lady teacher asks the pupils what kind of medicines they know andwhat they are used for.The first pupil said: Panado?Teacher:- Very good! And what is it used for?pupil:- It is used for headache.The second pupil said: Piriton.Teacher:- Excellent. And what it is used for?Second Pupil:-To help you sleep.Now it is Johnny's turn and he said:...
AN ABSOLUTELY BRILLANT JOKE
A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods. She went into the woods to look for it and found a frog in a trap. The frog said to her, 'If you release me from this trap, I will grant you three wishes.' The woman freed the frog, and the frog said, 'Thank you, but I failed to mention that there was a condition to your wishes. Your husband will get ten times what you get. She said, 'That's...
Favorite Flower
Once a Hindu, Muslim and our dear Santa Singh are standing when a Britisher comes and asks "Hey guys what are your favorite flowers?Hindu: "Lotus"Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!"Hindu is surprised and angry as lotus being national flower.Muslim: "Chameli"Britisher: "Ha I clean my shit with that!"Muslim also surprised and angry.Britisher: "sardarji and what is your favorite flower?"Patriotic Santa: "CACTUS! ab kar le...
Been Assed
We all know those cute little computer symbols called 'emoticons,' where::) means a smile and:( is a frown.Sometimes these are represented by:-):-(Well, how about some 'ASSICONS?'?Here goes:(_!_) a regular ass(__!__) a fat ass(!) a tight ass(_*_) a sore ass{_!_} a swishy ass(_o_) an ass that's been around(_x_)kiss my ass(_X_) leave my ass alone(_zzz_) a tired ass(_E=mc2_) a smart ass(_$_) Money coming out of his ass(_?_) Dumb...
Story why only Indians are re-born. Hilarious!
The angel Gabriel came to the Lord and said 'I have to talk to you. We have some Indians up here in heaven and they are causing problems. They're swinging on the pearly gates, my horn is missing, they are wearing Dolce and Gabana saris instead of their white robes, they are riding Mercedes and BMW's instead of the chariots, and they're selling their halos to people for discounted prices. They refuse to keep the stairway to Heaven...
Indian mind
An Indian man walks into a bank inNew York City and asks for the loan officer.He tells the loan officer that he is going to India on businessfor two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.The bank officer tells him that the bankwill need some form of security for the loan,so the Indian man hands over the keysand documents of new Ferrari parkedon the street in front of the bank.He produces the title and everything checks out.The loan...
T20 v/s EXAMS.
CRICKET T20 has reached exciting levels with IPL Introducing Same thing in EXAMs Some Suggestion *Reduce exam duration time to 1 hour and marks to 50 *Introduce strategic break after each 30mins * Give a free hit, I.e. A chance for students to frame their Own question paper *1st 15mins power play, I.e. No invigilator in the exam hall *Introduce...
Don't copy if you can't paste!
A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He Said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!"The audience was in silence and shock. The speaker added:"And that woman was my mother!" Laughter and ApplauseA week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack...
Think Before You Speak..!!
Here are six reasons why you should think before you speak - the last one is great!Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back...or that you could crawl into a hole?Here are the Testimonials of a few people who did...FIRST TESTIMONY: I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow...
Veg Chicken..
Each Friday night after work, Santa Singh would fire up his outdoor grill and cook a tandoori chicken and some meat kebabs. But, all of his neighbours were strict Catholics ... and since it was Lent, they were forbidden from eating chicken and meat on a Friday. The delicious aroma from the grilled meats was causing such a problem for the Catholic faithful that they finally talked to their Priest. The Priest came to visit...
Women
An old man and woman were married for many years, even though they hated each other. Whenever there was a confrontation, screaming and yelling could be heard deep into the night. The old man would shout, 'When I die, I will dig my way up and out of the grave and come back and haunt you for the rest of your life!' Neighbours feared him. They believed he practised black magic, because of the many strange occurrences that...
Blonde Joke !!!
It was Postman Pat's last day on the job after 35 years of carrying the post through all kinds of weather to the same neighbourhood. When he arrived at the first house on his route, he was greeted by the whole family there, who all hugged and congratulated him and sent him on his way with a gift cheque for $500. At the second house they presented him fine Cuban cigars in an18-carat gold box. The folks at the third house handed...
The Bathtub Test
> During a visit to the mental hospital, I asked the Doctor,> 'How do you determine whether or not a patient should be admitted to the hospital.'> 'Well,' said the Director, 'we fill up a bathtub, then we give a teaspoon, a teacup and a bucket to thepatient and ask him to empty the bathtub.''Oh, I understand,' I said.'A normal person would use the bucket because it's bigger than the spoon or the teacup.'> 'No.' said...
wedding night...
It seems that a young couple had just gotten married and spent their first wedding night with the young man's parents. In the morning, his mother got up and prepared a lovely breakfast including freshly cut flowers from her garden and gourmet food. She went to the bottom of the stairs and called everyone to come down to breakfast. Everyone came down, except the newlyweds.After a long wait, the family ate without them. The mother...
payback !!
Two high school sweethearts who went out together for four years in high school were both virgins; they enjoyed losing their virginity with each other in 10th grade. When they graduated, they wanted to both go to the same college but the girl was accepted to a college on the east coast, and the guy went to the west coast.They agreed to be faithful to each other and spend anytime they could together. As time went on, the guy would...
The New Nursery Rhyme
Raju Raju sat on the wall
Raju Raju had a great fall
Balance sheet died
Shareholders cried
Raju Raju made a fraud
Raju Raju
Yes baba
Cheating us
No baba
Telling Lies
No baba
Open the balance sheet
HA HA...
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